Saturday, August 22, 2020

Opening Arguments Rush Cover Songs

One of the best podcasts out there is Opening Arguments featuring Andrew Torrez and Thomas Smith. They explore legal stories that affect us all with thoughtfulness and levity. To that humorous end, Andrew has implied Rush isn't exactly his favorite band, alas it is mine, so I've taken the challenge to mash up a couple songs to honor Andrew and Thomas, and just perhaps bring them over into the "Rush is awesome" camp. 

(And, yes Thomas, a few of their older songs have an Ayn Rand spin to them, but so many of their songs incorporate science-minded, humanistic values...from Closer to the Heart to Red Tide to High Water to Faithless to Dreamline)

Optimus Sawyer

A modern-day lawyer-er
Mean, mean stride
Optimus Sawyer
Mean, mean elide
Though his points are relevant
Don't put him down as reverent
His reserve, a quiet defense
Debating the day's events
And Muller...
What you say about his amĭcus, brief
Is what you say about liberty
Catch the jist
Catch the just
Catch the judiciary
Catch the judge
The Law is, the Law is
Truth and life are deep
Maybe as his eyes are wide
Optimus Sawyer, he gets high on you
And the court he invades, he argues for you
No, his points are relevant
To the Constitution and government
Always hopeful, yet discontent
He knows changes aren't permanent
Stare decisis!
And what you say about his amēcus brief
Is what

The Spirit of Clownhorn

Begin the day
With a friendly curse
An expletive, unobtrusive
Play that clownhorn that's so effusive
And the clownhorn music makes the morning mood
Off on your frackin' way
Hit the freakin' road
There is clownhorn on your fingers
And the spittle ever lingers
Unrelenting god-smack
In your clownhorn solitude
Aweful airwaves
Cursing with life
Angry exclamations bristle
With the energy
Emotional outburst
On a clownhorn wavelength
Bearing a vile word at any price
Almost never clean
All this obscenity
Making clownhorn music
Can still be open-farted
Not so clownhorn thwarted
It's really just a question
Of your profanity, yeah, your profanity
One likes to believe
In the clownhorn of clownhorn
But clownhorning clownhorns
And clownhorn clownhorns
Create the impression
Of decency,

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