Desire

“Pity me that the heart is slow to learn
What the swift mind beholds at every turn.”

― Edna St. Vincent Millay

Desire is at the heart of the human mind's ongoing wishes for the future.

Billions of years of evolution have conditioned animal minds to be seekers of a panoply of good outcomes. Our very existence has depended on acquiring good nutrients, shelter and rest, warmth and care, reproductive and social well being, and more. As humans, our neurology and psychology are complexly predisposed to rewarding us for finding the things we desire, and to punish us to a degree when they are wanting.

In a modern context where survival within society is very different than out in the wild, the emotions that align with those primal desires weave quite the tapestry. We of course can feel happy and sated when our desires are fulfilled or sad and angry when deprived of something we want. We can also feel excited when something we desire seems possible, arguably fueling us to pursue that desire.

In romance, desire can get even more complicated. If mutual desire manifests it can lead them to spending time together in joyful discovery and an exploration of future life building. In the best of worlds, a healthy, lasting connection can result that inspires both people to pursue their best selves. Yet desire without mindful considerations can fan itself into an inferno or burn out leaving, rather than provide ongoing warmth.

"That which enchants, can also deceive." - Plato

Romantic desire that manifests at different levels between two people presents its own challenges. Unrequited feelings can cause hurt and stir up guilt even among the best of friends. Still, if there is respect between them, compassionate, rational minds can intervene and forge a compromise to move forward. Sometimes it just takes some time to reestablish a friendship with comfortable boundaries. Other times kindred spirits simply need to fly free to permit each other to discover their best selves on separate paths. 

(As an aside, I find it interesting that the desire themed adages "absence makes the heart grow fonder" and "out of sight, out of mind" both share popularity in our culture. Which I guess goes to show managing ones desire has an unpredictable side. Depending on luck and circumstance, sometimes it is inflamed and sometimes it is chilled.)

At the end of the day, desire is part of being human, of manifesting the drive to pursue the things we want in life. With a pinch of luck and mindful derring-do, desire can help steer the human ship toward its goals, alongside the goals of the those we care for.  Indeed, our desires can lift our spirits, and with compassion and reason engaged, help us soar high and navigate wondrous journeys.

Give the song  I Want You to Want Me by Cheap Trick 

a listen for a little musical desire connection